The tales of a contradictory photoshoot
– told by a curvy girl in today’s society.
Hey everyone. It’s your every day body positivity blog here with your favorite body image blogger. Me (haha, you can stop laughing now)! A little while ago, I made the decision to contact a lovely photographer and decided to have a Photo shoot that would focus on self empowerment. Morgan Langsdorf was incredible and I could not have chosen a better photographer to work with! Now, you might be wondering why is that so important. A lot of people have their pictures taken, Kallia. Why would that make you special? You see, I’m not a model, never was and I don’t technically aspire to be. What I wish is to challenge myself in ways I never thought possible that will eventually lead me to self love. Since I am a lifestyle blogger and I focus a lot of my material in body positivity, I thought the best way to reach each and every one of you was to show you, well… me. It is of upmost importance that I connect with you and if possible, I answer some questions you might have about body image, through my life experiences and my thought process that has brought me to today. As I have mentioned before, I have not arrived to a perfect body positivity mindset, this is still my journey and every day I am a step closer, even if I take a step back. Because through that, I can refocus, regroup and search further inside. I signed up for this life journey to self love, not for the easy path and I am in it for the long run. By being in front of the camera, I could possibly achieve a new found love for myself and my body.
Before any task I like to plan ahead. My photo shoot would not be an exception to my rule. I wanted to focus on the look and the vibe of the whole photography session, as well as make it enjoyable for my readers and bring my side of celebrating body positivity in all sizes and forms! As I started researching, I found myself looking through ways to pose and how should I position myself in front of the camera. Everything was perfectly normal at first, but I started noticing a slight obsession on the color clothing I should wear, what positions would make me look thinner and it started worrying me. Today’s society has a tendency to tell plus size individuals what to wear, how to dress, the clothing they should “avoid” for their sake and unfortunately I was falling for it. This is not why I wanted to do this photo shoot and I disliked the course it was taking. I paused and thought to myself, what do we do when we feel like we’re taking a step back? We refocus and regroup; And that is exactly what I did. I decided that all tips were out of the window. I had to challenge myself, I had to make a difference and not just for me at this point, but for anyone that is reading this blog. There’s a reason you’re here and I could not disappoint you.
So brainstorming started and my monologue went kinda like this:
First things first; black pants no more. My safe zone, my beloved black leggings or black pants; we would not be doing this today. Well, perhaps, I should wear my dark navy blue jeans. Nope, we would not bedoing that either, we promised we would challenge ourselves. Bring the light blue jeans forward! But they’re Parisian cropped. The tip for curvy girls taking pictures is that long pants will elongate the legs. But does it really matter? You love those jeans and they go against everything you should wear as a plus size girl; cropped, light in color and tight! Long story short, that’s how I decided that those pants will be a part of my photo shoot. For the shirt option, I had to take into account that I want to wear multiple jewelry and cardigans because quite frankly, I love accessories. It had to be a neutral option but then again it had to challenge me somehow, so a tight black shirt would fit perfectly in that profile. Any person that doesn’t feel good about the mid section of their body knows all too well how uncomfortable a tight shirt can be. But no worries, this only meant it was perfect for this contradictory photoshoot, which it only meant that it was coming with me. I was fearless and my decisions were my road to recovery! Afterwards, I decided which cardigans I wanted to bring with me and matched them to my favorite jewelry from The Precious Agate.
Morgan and I had set a date for the photo shoot and since industrial style was the vibe we were going with, downtown seemed like the best option. She’s a wonderful artist, a delight to work with and our collaboration was nothing but perfect. You will definitely see more of those in the future! If you have a moment, check out her amazing work, like and follow! These are her Facebook pages: Mojo Gallery and Studio, MadWyrd Art .
Fast forward to the day of the photo shoot. I expected, when I woke up that morning that I would feel a little anxious or perhaps I would reconsider my not-so-perfect option of an outfit. The funny thing is that I was not worried going into this and to my surprise, I felt a sense of relief… You see I believe I was ready to show you a part of me that needed to come to the surface. It was a long time coming and a lot of back-and-forth in my mind and I wanted you to see me vulnerable. The girl that hated cameras, is now posing in front of one and actually truthfully smiling, because this was her choice. She moved her body with joy and grace, not because she had to, but because she felt to. She played with air and light fabric not to hide behind a material, but because she enjoyed herself. She looked at the camera with confidence and in that moment she felt empowered. This was not her easiest choice, but it was one of her best ones. Because in that moment she took a step forward to self loving, she understood her body is worth loving for and she hopes if anybody reads this understands that it’s OK not to be perfect. It is perfectly fine to heal or better yourself, but at the same time you should love yourself now, because if not now… When?
It is hard sometimes to love oneself, but my experience has shown that is also very liberating. At moments of reflecting, my memories are so focused on judging me above all else and I missed the moment. I lost precious times that I could be truly happy and not worry about the little things. No more. That girl is so much more and it is her time to shine.
This has been one of my most openly written articles. My fingers typed in such a raw way and my mind was the one that ordered them. I really hope you enjoyed this and if you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. All pictures are taken by Morgan Langsdorf. Don’t forget to like my facebook page Kallia’s Everyday Talks and follow me on Instagram.